On My Way Here

The photo is of my Excedrin migraine medication. How I loathe and need thee.

After work today, my son, my sister, her fiance, and myself all went to Whole Foods and Meijer for grocery shopping. I bought some teeny fresh clams from Whole Foods. I ate them this afternoon, just steamed them open. I actually liked them! I shall have to get more next time I go to Whole Foods.  I bought all sorts of nummy goodness. I also bought a tiny thing of avocado rolls, eh. They were ok. I think the massive amount of pickled ginger in the container altered the flavor of the avocado for me. I just really want to like sushi-like food. For no logical reason. I have such issues.

I don’t know what it is this week, but I’ve been very not mentally all there. It just hasn’t been the best week… Jess noticed this and gave me the glory of Adagio Tea which I adore so much. I got a variety of white and green teas. I also got some lovely chamomile.  Just fabulous. I’ve been drinking 3 – 6 cups of tea at work the last couple of days.

Right now with the wind chill it’s –32. I’m sitting here with socks, pants, t shirt, sweater, and comforter wrapped around me. I am so sensitive to cold lately. Anyway, tomorrow is the super bowl of which our beloved Bears shall beat some ass. Everyone is so excited. I will actually watch the game this year. It’s practically sacrilegious to not be from the Chicago area and not be a Bears fan. I’m not too excited about the half-time show which is supposed to be Prince.

For dinner I made Chicken Italian Sausage Penne w/fresh herbs. Here’s the recipe!

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees. Cook your penne in salted boiling water until al dente and drain. This has 6 servings with Weight Watchers points of 5 per serving.

• 4 raw chicken italian sausage links, casings removed
• 6 cloves of garlic, minced
• 1 large sweet onion, sliced
• 1 large can of drained diced tomatoes
• 2 cups fresh basil leaves
• 1 cup fresh flat leaf parsley
• 1/2 cup grated parmesan
• 1/2 cup finely shredded part skim mozzarella cheese
• salt and fresh black pepper to taste
• 3 cups cooked penne

Now you can also use olive oil but I use an olive oil cooking spray as to not add points to my dinner. Spray a skillet and place on high heat. Add your sliced onions and cook until soft and golden brown. Put the onions in a large bowl. While on high heat, cook your chicken italian sausages, crumble the meat with a wooden spoon until no longer pink. Add your onions back and the garlic. Cook about a minute or two for the garlic to get happy. Add your diced tomatoes, salt, and fresh black pepper. Cook about 5 minutes until everything is heated through. Stir in 1/4 cup of the parmesan cheese and add your basil and parsley. After everything is well combined, spray a baking dish, I think mine is 9x13, and dump the whole pot of goodness in. Sprinkle with the remaining parmesan and the mozzarella cheeses. Bake until the cheese is melted, about 10 minutes or so.

Really tasty, really filling. The sausages are just as tasty and moist as pork italian sausages.

A Very Unique Day

Friday, I paid off both credit cards, car payment, phone bill, vehicle sticker, and village of Mount Prospect vehicle sticker.

Yesterday started off like any other day, dragging myself out of bed, getting cleaned up and dressed, making sure Danny is clean and dressed… if only I had known how utterly unique my day was going to be…

We headed off to go get fitted for contact lenses, I made the large mistake of wearing glittery eye makeup. After a bit of struggle I managed to bitch smack the contacts into submission on my eyes, when the woman ophthalmologist tested my vision while wearing the contacts, I told her the right eye was very blurry and she responded with, “No, you’re ok to drive, it’s fine”. It wasn’t fine. I noticed that while yes, I could drive, I had a sense of blurry vision that bothered me. Later on I closed my left eye just to see out of my right, sure enough, utterly blurry. I was (still am) furious and called the office back, only to be told I would have to come in at 1pm Sunday (today) to see a different doctor in a different location. Not happy.

After getting the contacts fitted, we drove up to Gurnee so we could shop while we waited for my sister to get off of work (she’s an assistant manager up there). I bought Daniel a Power Ranger toy set which he adores, for myself I bought a shirt, jeans, and thin coat, then shampoo and conditioner at bath and body works, because you seriously can’t beat outlet retail prices. After she clocked out, we then bought me some new shoes for working out and some t-shirts for Daniel (Power Ranger of course).

We then headed back home (it’s a 45 min drive or so), we stopped at a gas station so she could fill her car up and to let me remove my contacts that were just being evil because of the right eye being incorrect. Once we made it home we hurried and went to the Rec Plex to renew our memberships. Later on when checking my bank account online, I saw he charged me for 3 accounts instead of 2. I went back this morning and spent 30 minutes going over it, with print outs of everything of course, and he said there is no way he ran it three times and to call tomorrow morning to talk to his manager. I am not happy about this either.

So after renewing at the Rec Plex, we went to Qdoba (yum yum!) for dinner. We then went to Best Buy to bring my sister’s fiance a burrito and I then purchased an iPod Nano and armband for working out because my regular video iPod does not do well because it’s a hard drive, with all the prancing around. I also purchased a pre-paid cell phone through Verizon, my sister and her fiance have their phones through that company so whenever we call each other’s cell phones, it’s totally free which is nice. I have no one to talk to though really, anyone have Verizon cell service? Call me… naughty things… *winks*

After eating our super tasty dinner, we treked over to the shoe store where I bought Daniel new shoes and a Power Ranger umbrella. He loves his umbrella. Then we pranced over to the glory that is Ikea. I ended up buying a new garlic press, silverware drawer thingy, hangers for Daniel’s clothes… and oh yeah… a new desk and bed frame! My sister also purchased a bed frame. Now mind you I have a pert Scion xA car. We dropped Daniel off at home with my father, and then my sister and I, in below 0 temperatures, tied all of the bed and desk stuff to the roof of my car, managed to drag my stuff into my apartment, and drag her stuff up three flights of stairs. It was seriously like a Biggest Loser challenge.

After we did all of this heavy lifting, running up and down flights of stairs, learning to hate twine, we then decided to go to Meijer to get a few groceries and such. On the way there, mine you, it’s past 11pm, barely anyone is on the road. We are in the left hand lane going west bound when a car that was going east bound, jumped the median and headed straight for us. My sister only had to say my name and I swung the wheel to the right automatically, just barely avoiding a head on collision. We were both shaking and just beyond thankful we did not have my son in the car with us.

We then got to the store, did our shopping, and came home. I got an intense migraine, took some meds, tried to sleep, woke up on and off all night from the pain. Finally got up at 8am, took more meds, got cleaned up and dressed, and went over to my sister’s apartment this morning. I had an english muffin to try and settle my stomach. 

I then dealt with the Rec Plex stuff that I wrote above, so I am pissy that I have to call and deal with it again tomorrow, I also have to leave in ehh about an hour and a half to go deal with the contact lens crap. I also have to do our grocery shopping and laundry. Fun.

Right now, although I still feel really sick to my stomach, most of the head pain is gone. Danny is still sleeping. I’m just sitting here, still reeling from yesterday.

I just noticed my flickr account will expire in 6 days. I don’t have the funds allotted for that. Which sucks. Oh well.

I think I’m going to read my new Martha Stewart Living and Glamour magazines for a bit.

ETA

After getting utterly lost, I finally got the contact lens situation taken care of. I haven’t bought a supply yet because I want to make sure that I even like wearing contacts, that these are the proper strength, and that I can take care of them easily.

Talked to the Rec Plex manager and basically their credit card processor shows the 3^rd swipe, that it wasn’t a complete transaction, and that the funds should be given back to me no later than the 14^th. This is after being told I was wrong by two people, that it had to have been an error on my bank’s part… only to find out

ETA Again

After finding out I was missing an entire box from Ikea for the desk, going back to Ikea, staying up until 1am, I finally got it put together, even though it’s still missing a tiny piece of white wood… rawr. I shall tackle the bed frame tonight perhaps.

Oh, and I am so not in love with the snow right now and the lack of snow plows and salt. The roads around here are fucking dangerous and I hate driving when the snow is trying to make my car kill me.

Sunday, the 11^th, would have been my 8 year anniversary with my ex (you know, the evil abusive ass who sadly is my son’s biological sperm donor?). God. I am so glad that is over and done with.

I think I am going to eat a kiwi.

How to Let it all go?

I don’t know how to release my fear, my anger, my sadness.

I don’t know how to come to terms with how I was treated during my pregnancy, my son’s birth, and the first few months of his life outside of my womb. I don’t know how to accept that my ex-fiance made the conscious choice to have sex with other females while engaged to me. I don’t know how to write freely anymore without repercussion from friends and family. I don’t know how to separate myself from online people that I have nothing in common with. I don’t know how I am going to handle my son starting kindergarten. I can’t figure out how I’ve made it this long being a single mother. I have no idea what will happen when the lease is up for renewal at the end of June. I don’t know where my creative spark went.

I can’t function much anymore. I’m sinking.

ETA

Thank you so much Ethel for the pro flickr account! I really appreciate it! It made me smile today, thank you!

Gravity of Love

I somehow managed to accomplish quite a bit this weekend which is surprising considering how much Daniel and I slept. I scoured the bathroom, bedroom, kitchen (which I am furious about right now because I just looked and the stove and counter is covered in tomato sauce from whatever my father made himself for dinner and didn’t clean back up), did three loads of laundry, did my grocery shopping, and took Daniel sledding! Whew!

I don’t have much to say, still a bit raw right now. Going to go watch Goonies with Danny. So here’s a few photos.

In this next photo, here’s a young girl that was being super helpful and helped Daniel get his sled back. Basically, the sled ended up going down the snow hill before he did!

What I Am

I haven’t been around much… February just isn’t my month emotionally.

I’ve been reverting a bit musically and reveling in the 90’s. Kris Kross — Jump and Marilyn Manson — The Beautiful People are the newest to my “classic” 90’s collection. I also really like the Music and Lyrics soundtrack, especially Haley Bennett — Buddha’s Delight!

Ostara is coming up in a few weeks, not sure what I want to do. Daniel could care less about coloring eggs. Any suggestions? What are some good gemstones for Ostara? I reorganized my desk so that the shelf above my monitor has all of my photo gear and photography books and the shelf above that has some gemstones and my tarot decks. What are some of your favorite pagan websites and blogs? I signed up and got myself a CovenSpace over at StarryMom (of course!) after seeing Steph’s covenspace. The closer it gets to spring the more I crave renewal and farmer’s markets lol.

My hostee Kat has started blogging again so go check her out! I am always open for hosting if y’all know of anyone interested.

I’m debating once again, should I use Flickr or Zooomr for my photography (especially for what I post on OSN). I deleted imagine entirely due to massive amounts of direct linking which sucks. Speaking of, here are some recent photos.

ETA

I am going to be going to the library either tonight or tomorrow night, what books should I pick up? Doesn’t matter if it’s fiction or non-fiction.

ETA Again

Too lazy for another full on entry! I was pondering a bit ago and I realized that most likely I conceived Danny on Beltane which would make sense from when he was born… I don’t know why I get a kick out of that.

Photo Post

I’m very blah lately, can’t seem to focus enough to write what I want! It’s a February thing. March will be my posty month I swear. Anyway, here are a bunch of recent yet random photos.

Smoky Quartz Hosted on Zooomr

Rose Quartz Hosted on Zooomr

Blue Lace Agate ? Hosted on Zooomr

Lapis, Peridot, Lepidolite Hosted on Zooomr

Amethyst Hosted on Zooomr

Peridot Hosted on Zooomr

Turquoise Hosted on Zooomr

Jade Hosted on Zooomr

Red Tiger’s Eye Hosted on Zooomr

Goldstone Hosted on Zooomr

Lapis Hosted on Zooomr

Snowflake Obsidian Hosted on Zooomr

Lepidolite Hosted on Zooomr

My desk shelves above my monitor, obviously the bottom one has my photography books and gear and my workout podlet. The shelf above that has my tarot decks, (thanks Melissa and MJ!) and my crystals/stones.

Shelves Hosted on Zooomr

Prism Hosted on Zooomr

Mary gave me this utterly perfect notebook. Anyone that knows me and glitter… oh yeah. Almost as perfect as naughtry.

Awesome Notebook Hosted on Zooomr

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This is my magnetic white erase board. It my mom’s RN (registered nurse) photo, a photo from the lovely Laura, a drawing from my son, and my dragonfly ornament.

Whiteboard Hosted on Zooomr

What used to be my BOS (book of shadows). I did the cover back in 2002 when Danny was just a wee tiny baby.

BOS Hosted on Zooomr