Comments on: I Gave Up on Having a Mom http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/ design.attachment parenting.photography.glitter. Mon, 21 May 2012 09:08:02 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: OneStarryNight.com: Follow-Up to “My Mom Abused Me” http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-18960 OneStarryNight.com: Follow-Up to “My Mom Abused Me” Mon, 23 Apr 2012 10:47:10 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-18960 [...] Seriously though, I didn’t expect an apology. I do wonder why she skipped over all the sexual stuff she said/did (Honestly? That wasn’t even the worst of it, I only covered one year in that post). I actually don’t grasp 80% of what she said because it just didn’t make sense to me. I really wasn’t surprised how many times she brought up my twin sister. She’s always made it crystal clear that she favored her. [...] […] Seriously though, I didn’t expect an apology. I do wonder why she skipped over all the sexual stuff she said/did (Honestly? That wasn’t even the worst of it, I only covered one year in that post). I actually don’t grasp 80% of what she said because it just didn’t make sense to me. I really wasn’t surprised how many times she brought up my twin sister. She’s always made it crystal clear that she favored her. […]

]]> By: Amanda Jillian http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-18869 Amanda Jillian Wed, 18 Apr 2012 13:48:52 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-18869 Again, I am so sorry for you. I know how family can hurt but thankfully I've never had anything like that to me personally. However my cousin, who was actually my best friend in junior high, did. Her mom would kick her out and we would take her in every time. Then she would call the cops saying she had run away! When she turned 16 my family said screw it and went and got her from her house, packed up her measly amount of stuff (most of which we had given her) and gave her a great birthday which is Christmas. She said the emancipation process. Now they try to call or write her for money. They have no clue that she is in graduate school and in the city. But she has a family that loves her now. Again, I am so sorry for you. I know how family can hurt but thankfully I’ve never had anything like that to me personally. However my cousin, who was actually my best friend in junior high, did. Her mom would kick her out and we would take her in every time. Then she would call the cops saying she had run away! When she turned 16 my family said screw it and went and got her from her house, packed up her measly amount of stuff (most of which we had given her) and gave her a great birthday which is Christmas. She said the emancipation process. Now they try to call or write her for money. They have no clue that she is in graduate school and in the city. But she has a family that loves her now.
shared blog post — My faeries may sparkle but not with “fairy dust”

]]> By: Firas http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-16351 Firas Wed, 19 Oct 2011 14:31:15 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-16351 It's sad to read about your relationship with your mother. But rarely sometimes it is a write-up what makes us more sad. Reading through the sad lines you have endured, those things you wish to forget, those you wish never to cross your mind, is explained, quoted and narrated and punctuated in sadness. But I do not know your state of mind when you wrote this post. It might be different from what I thought. However I think that chapter is over in time, and you got busy with your own life and family--which I read with great interest. I admire your power at those difficult times. You have a strong mind. I also believe you do make a great mom! Your kids are lucky to get such a lovely mom! And I'm sure that you make them feel like no one could have ever loved them like the way you do. Because you know how difficult and sad it is, when unloved. Cheers :) It’s sad to read about your relationship with your mother.

But rarely sometimes it is a write-up what makes us more sad. Reading through the sad lines you have endured, those things you wish to forget, those you wish never to cross your mind, is explained, quoted and narrated and punctuated in sadness. But I do not know your state of mind when you wrote this post. It might be different from what I thought.

However I think that chapter is over in time, and you got busy with your own life and family–which I read with great interest. I admire your power at those difficult times. You have a strong mind. I also believe you do make a great mom! Your kids are lucky to get such a lovely mom! And I’m sure that you make them feel like no one could have ever loved them like the way you do. Because you know how difficult and sad it is, when unloved.

Cheers :)

]]> By: Claudia http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-14419 Claudia Wed, 23 Mar 2011 23:00:02 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-14419 OMG! I totally feel for you! I only see my mother to take her to the doctor and pharmacy. I don't call her, she calls me when she needs something. Since my father &. Brother died, it's been hell! I won't take my kids to see her or stay any length of time because she has a "friend" who is a drug dealer, user, alcoholic and spousal abuser. I also suspect my mother is covering for him on being responsible for my brothers death. I mean this guy actually hit another of my mother's friends on the head with a heavy cast iron frying pan. And she wonders why we don't go there or why we don't want him around and included in family functions. He has threatened to hurt or kill my aunt, as well. I have great memories with my grandparents. My kids will remember how good it was until grandpa died. Those will get them through, happily. Try not to feel bad. We have to keep our families safe and love them the best we can. Hugs to you for realizing you needed to stay away! OMG! I totally feel for you! I only see my mother to take her to the doctor and pharmacy. I don’t call her, she calls me when she needs something.
Since my father &. Brother died, it’s been hell! I won’t take my kids to see her or stay any length of time because she has a “friend” who is a drug dealer, user, alcoholic and spousal abuser.
I also suspect my mother is covering for him on being responsible for my brothers death. I mean this guy actually hit another of my mother’s friends on the head with a heavy cast iron frying pan.
And she wonders why we don’t go there or why we don’t want him around and included in family functions. He has threatened to hurt or kill my aunt, as well.
I have great memories with my grandparents. My kids will remember how good it was until grandpa died. Those will get them through, happily.
Try not to feel bad. We have to keep our families safe and love them the best we can. Hugs to you for realizing you needed to stay away!

]]> By: Sarah http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-10466 Sarah Thu, 29 Jul 2010 20:16:57 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-10466 Keith's mother basically abandoned him after his father died. She moved hmm 8-9 years ago to another state and hasn't seen him since, really makes no effort, etc. I set my mother's emails to my spam folder lol. Thank you for your comment!!! Keith’s mother basically abandoned him after his father died. She moved hmm 8–9 years ago to another state and hasn’t seen him since, really makes no effort, etc.

I set my mother’s emails to my spam folder lol.

Thank you for your comment!!!

]]> By: MaryB http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-10461 MaryB Thu, 29 Jul 2010 18:17:00 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-10461 Hello! THis is my comment, you paid nothing for it, so take it for what it's worth! :) Everyone needs a mother, I mean besides a bio-mother. The "mother" you give yourself and the grandmother you give your children, does not have to be your bio-mother. For whatever reason, and it doesn't have to be your fault, your bio mother doesn't seem capable of being yur mother. My first piece of advice is for you to change your e-mail, or block her e-mail from your account. There is NO reason for you to be tortured by her e-mails. For physical mail, I would ask your husband to check all mail that comes into the house, and let him censor out any mail that comes from her. If it is anice birhtday card for any member of your family, then he should let it through, but I mean only after he reads it and is sure there isn't any mean message on the inside. Otherwise, any mean letters from your mom, should be filed in the garbage and you should never even know that they came. Any important news about your mother should be related by your sister, and she shouldn't tell you ANY of the mean things that your mom says about you, or blames you for. Now for the needing a mother, is Keith's mother nice to you? She could be a substitute mom for you. So could an older friend that yu meet in real life, or over the net. What do we need mothers for? As a sounding board, for advice, for comfort. Is there an older woman that does this for you already? She could be your substitute mom. YOu don't deserve to be abused by anyone, family or "friend or lover." Stay strong, you are worth it! Hello! THis is my comment, you paid nothing for it, so take it for what it’s worth! :)

Everyone needs a mother, I mean besides a bio-mother. The “mother” you give yourself and the grandmother you give your children, does not have to be your bio-mother. For whatever reason, and it doesn’t have to be your fault, your bio mother doesn’t seem capable of being yur mother. My first piece of advice is for you to change your e-mail, or block her e-mail from your account. There is NO reason for you to be tortured by her e-mails. For physical mail, I would ask your husband to check all mail that comes into the house, and let him censor out any mail that comes from her. If it is anice birhtday card for any member of your family, then he should let it through, but I mean only after he reads it and is sure there isn’t any mean message on the inside. Otherwise, any mean letters from your mom, should be filed in the garbage and you should never even know that they came. Any important news about your mother should be related by your sister, and she shouldn’t tell you ANY of the mean things that your mom says about you, or blames you for.

Now for the needing a mother, is Keith’s mother nice to you? She could be a substitute mom for you. So could an older friend that yu meet in real life, or over the net. What do we need mothers for? As a sounding board, for advice, for comfort. Is there an older woman that does this for you already? She could be your substitute mom.

YOu don’t deserve to be abused by anyone, family or “friend or lover.”

Stay strong, you are worth it!
shared blog post — Bloggers beware!

]]> By: Sarah http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-10194 Sarah Mon, 19 Jul 2010 22:17:49 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-10194 I think to some degree the apology is more for the abuser than for the victim. There's just no way to repair the trust. I am SO sorry your daughter had to go through that. I think to some degree the apology is more for the abuser than for the victim. There’s just no way to repair the trust.

I am SO sorry your daughter had to go through that.

]]> By: Danielle - simple.little.joys. http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-10182 Danielle - simple.little.joys. Mon, 19 Jul 2010 14:53:29 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-10182 Sarah - You are an AMAZING Mom and a BEAUTIFUL person (both inside and out) IN SPITE OF the way your "mom" treated you. Good for you for taking a stand and cutting her out of your (and the boys') life. You (and they) deserve better, and are better off without her vitriol. xo, Danielle Sarah — You are an AMAZING Mom and a BEAUTIFUL person (both inside and out) IN SPITE OF the way your “mom” treated you. Good for you for taking a stand and cutting her out of your (and the boys’) life. You (and they) deserve better, and are better off without her vitriol.

xo,
Danielle

]]> By: Laura http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-10129 Laura Thu, 15 Jul 2010 12:24:56 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-10129 Sometimes I wonder why people even have children. My daughter (who is 20 now) suffered emotional abuse from her dad starting about age 4 or 5. He would call her stupid, ignorant, fat, when she was 7 & he called her a "stupid bitch", I knew I had to find a way out of there. Luckily, he finally did apologize to her for the way he treated her when she was 17, so they do have a better relationship, but she has had so many problems growing up. Sometimes I wonder why people even have children. My daughter (who is 20 now) suffered emotional abuse from her dad starting about age 4 or 5. He would call her stupid, ignorant, fat, when she was 7 & he called her a “stupid bitch”, I knew I had to find a way out of there. Luckily, he finally did apologize to her for the way he treated her when she was 17, so they do have a better relationship, but she has had so many problems growing up.
shared blog post — TEEN TRENDS– GO AHEADTALK TO YOUR TEENAGER!

]]> By: Sarah http://onestarrynight.com/gave-up-on-having-a-mom/#comment-10099 Sarah Wed, 14 Jul 2010 19:32:12 +0000 http://onestarrynight.com/?p=6132#comment-10099 You understand completely. I literally will force myself to shove down any resurfacing memories. I just can't handle it really. You understand completely. I literally will force myself to shove down any resurfacing memories. I just can’t handle it really.

]]>