Maybe sad doesn’t quite capture how I feel, depressed more like it. I know all of this will seem jumbled but I need to get it out of my head.
I can’t pinpoint a specific reason either. Read the Whole Post
W Read the Whole Posthen I went from being a single full-time working mother to ONE child to being a stay at home momma to TWO boys, to say it’s been an adjustment would be an understatement.
I Read the Whole Post know I can’t be the only one.
The past decade has been packed full of drama and change that I’ve come to fear it in some ways. Just to give an idea, here’s a timeline:
2000: Got hit by Matt for the first time.
N Read the Whole Posto one is perfect. Everyone dislikes some part of themselves.
For me I could probably narrow it down to a specific few:
sticking in troubled relationships for far too long
I’ve managed to get out of all the bad relationships in my life so that’s a plus.
Late at night is the worst for me mentally.
I have a tendency to rehash the past in my mind (as in the past few decades!) and I want to talk about it all, NEED to talk about it all on some level. Read the Whole Post
It’s slowly getting better, this anger, this sadness. I can now find beauty in everyday life (aside from my kids) where I couldn’t a few months ago.
It’s hard because sometimes I almost feel shame or guilt that BOTH of my c-sections were medically needed. Read the Whole Post
It’s amazing how much can happen in a single year.
I am having one heck of a time of it lately, emotionally anyway. I am really unsure of why. I know part of this feeling, this “what’s the point” or “I am never productive”, isn’t based in reality, and yet that doesn’t stop my brain from THINKING that way. Read the Whole Post
Bear with me as this will be disjointed and make no sense I’m sure.
Monday, Sept 28th, I woke up to pee (ah how I don’t miss that part of pregnancy), and when I wiped I saw a large volume of blood. Read the Whole Post
Obviously having a newborn makes it difficult to be online, even with a Blackberry and laptop, I am going through withdrawal!
There’s so much more to the birth story than I posted earlier (which was blogged from my blackberry while on pain meds in the hospital). Read the Whole Post