sleepybabyondaddy

I feel so much love for my family.

I couldn’t ask for a better father for my boys. My oldest son has taken to calling his bio-father by his first name and calling Keith his “real daddy”.

Sometimes, I realize how lucky I really am.

For those who have children, how is their relationship with their father?

If you do not have children, how is your own relationship with your father?

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posted on December 20th 2009 at 2:59AM CST

What a beautiful picture and post! My son is still a baby, but he just lights up when his Daddy enters the room. I love it! My relationship with my own father was complicated and so my wish for my son is that he be able to be close with my husband.
.-= {shared blog entry – My Life Motto} =-.

posted on December 20th 2009 at 3:06AM CST

Thank you! It’s amazing to me, the difference a father can make in a boys life especially.

My oldest son’s bio-father (long story there ugh), was rarely there for his son as a baby much less now. My current boyfriend not only is there 100% for our newest baby but considers my oldest his son, plays with him constantly, teaches him, shares with him, etc. Even my son has noticed a HUGE difference and started calling his bio-father by his name (not that they communicate with each other), but calling the boyfriend “Daddy” or “real daddy”.

The baby also seems to have his moments where only Daddy can make it all better, which always surprises me because, hey, I have the awesome milkies lol!

My relationship with my father is also complicated, and like you, just want my boys to have a close and healthy relationship with their Daddy.

posted on December 20th 2009 at 3:18AM CST

That’s such an awesome shot, Sarah! The B&W really adds to the emotion. If that makes sense?

Juan is GREAT with Ethan. He calls Ethan his little sidekick because they’re practically inseparable. It’s so cute. Ethan really looks up to him too. He’s always telling me “I’m going to get big like Daddy. And I’m gonna go to work like Daddy so I can buy you coffee and me toys.” Makes my heart melt.

It’s just amazing, isn’t it?
.-= {shared blog entry – New theme} =-.

posted on December 20th 2009 at 3:39AM CST

Thank you so much! It totally makes sense!

It really is amazing, I don’t think I really appreciated HOW amazing it is until I saw Keith with Daniel. To see the difference between Dan’s bio-father and this man who hasn’t even KNOWN Danny a year yet (it will be one year this upcoming March), is astounding to me. I really lucked out. Plus when it comes to Tristan, Keith is so on-board with attachment parenting, he will babywear, changes all the cloth diapers when he’s home, etc.

Caity
posted on December 20th 2009 at 3:54AM CST

That is really sweet. I’m glad that you have such a great man in your life who is such a wonderful father to your children. You are very lucky.

I don’t have kids yet but I know that Josh will be a great father one day. We have even talked about kids already but we are both not ready yet.

I am very close with my dad. I’m a daddy’s girl. I am way closer with my father than with my mother. I played softball since the age of 5 all the way through college ball and my dad never missed a game. That means more than anyone ever knows. Whenever I need anything, the first person I want to ask is my dad. Sometimes I have to realize that I should ask my husband now!! It takes some adjusting for me.

Amanda
posted on December 20th 2009 at 5:35AM CST

I love the picture. It’s amazing the relationship between a father and child.

Randy and Gracie started off shaky. He was afraid of hurting her or doing something wrong. He wasn’t really involved with her which had me worried but once he had some time off of work and began holding her, playing with her, etc.. I saw something completely different. I can’t even describe the emotion that comes over me when I see them together. She has so much power over him in so many ways already because he loves her so much. It’s an amazing sight to see.
.-= {shared blog entry РGracie’s Christmas pictures} =-.

Simon
posted on December 20th 2009 at 7:04AM CST

Sounds like its awesome being you right now :D Hope you all have a really nice holidays and that the recent huge amount of snow I have heard of in the news hasn’t affected you guys.

Dionna
posted on December 20th 2009 at 8:34AM CST

My son just turned two years old, so his relationship with his papa is more a playful one than anything else. I am still his source of comfort (get hurt? get mama’s milk. someone take a toy? cry to mama, possibly get mama’s milk. sleepy? definitely get mama’s milk.).
It’s been interesting to see the dynamic between the two change. My hubby moans and groans sometimes because our son “just wants me”, etc. – but I was trying to tell him last night that the phases are passing so quickly. Things he lamented a year ago are a distant memory.

P.A.
posted on December 20th 2009 at 2:17PM CST

Seeing as I have zero relationship with my father for the last 20 years and three months (no, I’m not actively keeping track…) it’s important to me that my son knows his father and develops a close relationship with him. So far he doesn’t care himself. I felt jealous reading Tristan has ‘daddy only!’ needs. My son’s daddy only need is when we have been out for hours and my back begins to hurt from carrying him (he’s tiny but my posture when holding him kills my back, I don’t know how to fix it!) and I have to carry him in a way he can’t look around. He gets so angry : P So I find his dad and have him carry for a while. Even if he’s in a sling I still tilt my pelvis, I don’t know how to stop doing it. Bad, bad habit!

I’m happy for Daniel. I was never close with my step dad, by the time he left it was a relief. Now he thinks I’m a bad influence because I am a 25 year old unwed mother (despite being in a 4.5 year relationship and my son being only 2.5 months) so he refuses to let me see my younger siblings until they’re 18. Fortunately he’s not the custodial parent, so it’s not really his decision.

It’s too sad how many men are incapable of even staying around to be a dad : (

posted on December 20th 2009 at 4:13PM CST

I began a comment, but it got long… Really long… So I wrote a post in response instead.

posted on December 20th 2009 at 7:20PM CST

@Caity, that’s great that you are so close to your father! Why do you think you don’t have the same kind of relationship with your mother?

@Amanda, I was slightly worried that Keith would be like that initially with Tristan but happily he proved me wrong, he’s always been hands-on. When it comes to Daniel’s bio-father, he was (and is) extremely lazy, even as I recall, the first week we were home from the hospital (I was recovering from that c-section), he put on a PPV pornography movie in the living room while I was trying to get the hang of breastfeeding. Ah, a bit of left over bitterness on my end. So it’s almost as if Keith is from the complete opposite end of the spectrum, he’s the “correct” father if you will.

@Simon, life has definitely improved dramatically in the last year and a half. I totally couldn’t imagine this would be my life a mere two years ago!

@Dionna, lol oh yes, if all else fails, the boob will solve any problem! It’s funny, my oldest seems to “only” want Daddy time and occasionally I feel left out, even though I wouldn’t want to wrestle or discuss weaponry from the Revolutionary War, but I understand logically that in a day, week, whatever, I get my Mommy time. With the baby, like right now as I type this response, he is very much chilling with his Daddy time.

@P.A., my heart just breaks for you, you’re like a single mother in a house full of negativity daily. I can understand it though since it’s what I dealt with, with Danny’s bio-father. I wish you were able to find a peaceful place to raise your son.

@Erin, what a fabulous blog entry! I need to go over and comment on your post now!

Caity
posted on December 20th 2009 at 7:30PM CST

Sarah, it’s not that my mother and I aren’t close it’s just that I’m way closer with my father. My mom and I tend to butt heads a lot because our personalities can clash. I still love my mom to death and fully respect and ask for her opinion a lot. My dad and I are just way more alike.

Angel
posted on December 20th 2009 at 8:10PM CST

I’ve never met my father, nor do I have any acknowledge of him ever existing. The entire situation with him has remained a mystery due to a stubborn mother. However, I do feel if I were to ever have children with my husband, they’d have the most wonderful father that either of us ever had. I am so happy when I see children with good fathers. It just makes a family complete.
.-= {shared blog entry – R.I.P. Brittany Murphy} =-.

Kimm
posted on December 20th 2009 at 10:21PM CST

When I was a lot younger I was really close to my dad but we both grew a part.

My birth-daughters bio father was never in the picture when I was pregnant.. he showed up when she was 2 days old in the hospital to see her for 45mins. When I get to see her around the holidays, I can tell she is a mega daddy’s girl/tomboy.
.-= {shared blog entry – Uber Busy} =-.

posted on December 20th 2009 at 11:59PM CST

@Caity, that’s understandable, I’m sure a lot of people connect more with one parent over the other, depending on personality types, level of involvement, etc.

@Angel, It must be frustrating, to not have any answers about your father. Do you ever wonder if he’s looking to have a relationship with you?

@Kimm, I wonder if being a mother makes you MORE aware of the father-child relationship?

Dez
posted on December 21st 2009 at 5:06AM CST

Growing up I had a horrible relationship with my Father has he was mentally, verbally, and physically abusive toward me. There are lots of things he’s done that I will never be able to forgive or forget. I often wonder if it was because I am the only child that resembles our Mother the most. Either way that is irrelevant.

Since leaving his house to live on my own our ‘relationship’ has vastly improved as I am no longer under his thumb or control. We are able to converse but any time I have ever ‘moved back’ (Jeremy & I’s lease was up at our apartment and getting into our house took longer than expected.) things start to get rocky again.

posted on December 21st 2009 at 2:21PM CST

Dez, I really understand your situation, it almost mirrors my own growing up. According to my father, I look/act like my mother… according to my mother I am a replica of my father. A lose/lose situation when it comes to how I was treated compared to my siblings.

I also agree that living apart from them has improved the relationship but it’s always hard to forgive/forget, at least for me.

Kristi
posted on December 22nd 2009 at 9:02AM CST

Beautiful photo! I love the way men seem to evolve and become a whole other person when they become fathers. They maintain their masculinity, yet a softer side begins to emerge.
My father and I had a wonderful relationship, growing up. He made it his mission to verbalize his love for my brother, mother and myself. We were the center of his universe. He taught me everything I know about love and compassion. These days, his grandchildren are the center of his universe. He’s a wonderful grandfather.
We have something in common, sort of. My husband and I have been married for almost 2 years now. We met 3 years ago. He fell in love with me and my 3 children from my previous marriage. He considers them to be his children and they call him “Dad”. I’m such a lucky girl to have been blessed with a man who loves my children as much as he loves our baby.
Sounds like you have a wonderful man. Daniel and Tristan are lucky boys. :)

kasper
posted on December 22nd 2009 at 10:23PM CST

There is nothing sexier (IMHO) than a man snuggling his baby! I went through a really long labour having my son and I was so exhausted afterward I was really thankful that my husband stayed with me. He walked my son around the hospital corridors for hours while I slept. He had the absolute best comment after he returned. With all seriousness he declared that our son was the best looking baby in the entire hospital. I told him that he might be a touch biased, but he said “no really, I looked, he is the cutest”. Awwwh.
After 2 & a half years my little guy is depending less and less on me and more and more on his Daddy. As sad as that makes me, I love watching them together. It’s like they speak a special language together.
.-= {shared blog entry – Merry Christmas to Me} =-.

posted on December 23rd 2009 at 3:45AM CST

@Kristi, thank you!! Tristan is really into “daddy” time lately. It’s so sweet! Oh wow, it sounds like you had a fantastic father and role model! It’s so awesome, even rare, to have a father that involved. You’re right, I really did luck out in the “man” department lol.

@Kasper, omgosh I completely agree, throw in some babywearing and *swoon* I am down for the count!

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