I just called his mother I didn’t think he would be there already, to get her to pay my sister back for his bus ticket. His mother gave the phone to him. I said, “I can not talk to you I called to speak to your mother” and he gave his classic sigh. I just started crying, I am still crying. I can not express how badly I am hurting right now. I tried to talk to my sister but she said it doesn’t matter, that he is out of our lives now. He will never be out of MY life. I am raising HIS son. I can never get rid of everything that was his. I just. Gods. I need someone. I can not be alone all day every day while my family works. I can’t be alone with my thoughts. What did I ever do to deserve this?

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Keli
posted on March 6th 2003 at 8:47AM CDT

I second what Jennifer said!  You have not done anything to deserve this.  Do not blame yourself for his actions!  ((hugs)) I am here for you if you need anything…let me know!

Roni
posted on March 6th 2003 at 12:25PM CDT

OMG…I just read what happened. I’m so sorry, sweetie. I’m here if you need me. I’m not on AOLIM a lot, but when I’m on, feel free to pop in & rant & rave to me.

*hugs*

Just remember that you can do it. If not for you, for that beautiful son of yours.

kristen
posted on March 6th 2003 at 12:54PM CDT

I just second and third or whatever everything said here.  I haven’t had much time to talk to you, but I know what a wonderful person you are and you definitely DON’T deserve an of this.  Please just let me know if there is anything I can do.  For now, I am just praying and lighting candles for you.  *hugs*

Barb
posted on March 6th 2003 at 1:55PM CDT

Sarah, like Jen said, YOu didn’t do anything to deserve this.  Ditto all else… also you are not alone, besides your friends you have Chubs… There truly is no greater gift to you right now he can be your enlightment and strength if you let him in …

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