Journal: End Of Year
What challenges did you face? From the first hour of the first day of 2022 when my tooth broke, I grind a lot from my migraines and sleep issues like vivid nightmares – yes, I have a custom night guard, to when I’m writing this on December 30th with a migraine, it’s been rough. Toss in financial issues, an unhealthy marriage, living in an area with no sidewalks, and then throw in the isolation, which is a lot.
What lessons did you learn? Nothing positive.
How did you grow? I don’t know if I have. I don’t know how one can assess that.
How did your heart break? The losses of Creampuff and Moon. I can’t talk about it. I still can’t talk about October ’21. My heart bleeds daily. The silent treatment from my sister for the past two weeks and counting. Because I am high risk, we are so limited in what we can do outside the house because people want to pretend that Covid no longer exists or is no more than a severe cold.
How did your heart open? As always, watching my sons grow and mature.
What do you want to remember? Any of the good days, as far and few as they may be. All the little moments with my sons. My conversations with my best friend. Perfect coffee from Onyx Coffee Lab, especially Tropical Weather, which I use to make espresso for my daily latte.
What do you want to celebrate? So many positive things happened to people around me, and my sons are in excellent health. We had a terrific year with gardening as well. Reconnecting with old friends.
How do you want to approach 2023? Just the hope that I can get my health improved. It’s frustrating to do everything one is supposed to do, and more, and it gets worse.
What qualities do you want to cultivate? Stop babbling when I talk to anyone who are not my sons. I get so excited to talk to an adult, any adult, that I start rambling endlessly. I worry that my personality is… too much.
What do you want to let go of? Fear. Always fear.
How do you want to grow? To try to find myself again, I’ve turned into this person so afraid to trigger others that I am now a crispy husk of the person I used to be.
How do you want to take care of yourself? By sticking with my healthy habits and routine, even if it’s a night-owl one.
How will you commit to yourself? To my health, as always, hoping this is the year we get the medications and dosages in a functioning or, even better, an optimal zone.
Where will you pour your attention? Into my kids, cats, and my health. I hope the universe gives me a break, as I’m unsure how much more I can take.
What habits or practices nourish you? To stay organized and to use my digital planner heavily.
Well, that’s my 2022 end-of-the-year journal review. If you have a blog, I recommend you participate in this prompt as it’s good sometimes to reflect on what you’ve been through and any hopes for the future year.