It’s amazing how much can happen in a single year.
I am having one heck of a time of it lately, emotionally anyway. I am really unsure of why. I know part of this feeling, this “what’s the point” or “I am never productive”, isn’t based in reality, and yet that doesn’t stop my brain from THINKING that way. This feeling only cropped up about 2-3 weeks ago or so.
Logically I know being stuck in the house, lack of outside time, limited adult contact (aside from the boyfriend), all contribute to this feeling. I’ve also been having a lot more PTSD issues when it comes to trying to deal with my failed VBAC (placenta abruption), sadly that is just going to take a lot of time to accept.
I’m sure getting my fertility back isn’t helping matters either.
It’s frustrating though, I am a lot more weepy, bitchy, and tired lately because of the emotional overload and I am just not sure how to rectify the situation.
The boys however are doing awesome. Daniel currently has a paper mache volcano drying and some rock crystals growing. Tristan is such a little chatterbox, it’s so adorable to have a “conversation” with him. I still have moments every day where I can’t believe I have TWO children. It’s so amazing to me. Daniel is always playing with his baby brother or carrying him. I can’t wait until the baby is able to chase his big brother around!
Keith pretty much forced me to go outside this morning and shoot some photos while Tristan is asleep.
I am really enjoying the D90 although I haven’t spent much time with it or played with any of the different features (compared to the D50). I do like the more intuitive controls, much better in low light situations, very low noise at high ISO’s… I am really happy with that purchase.
Lastly, when Keith ran to the store late last night, he bought me a small miniature rose plant! I can’t wait until it blooms further and grows so we can plant it outside!