Do you ever just sit down doing not a damn thing maybe listenin to music but not really doing anything that requires thought and then have a feeling of happiness just wash over you? Doesn’t last long but it leaves you with a slight tingle and for that few minutes you feel like YES EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY well i just had that and im in the tingle mode, lately I’ve had to deal with a hard decision and I don’t have to really decide for a bit but I am a Libra so of course i mull over it but you know what even though it will be really hard and my life will totally change i have to go thats the BEST FOR *ME* it may mean being on my own for a bit really finding out WHAT i can handle i’ve had to put up with a lotof hard crap and a lot of stuff kids my age have no clue about but i mean how it would be to just be ME have fun be serious SURVIVE. everyday I see some sort of hate or fighting and I really want to just scream at them that they have it easy if their fights are only online based because when it comes to the real world you CAN’T turn it off every day you wake up and breathe the same air as the rest of us and if you can’t hack it in the real world then what makes you think anyone can respect you online? if you don’t hold yourself in the HIGHEST reguard no matter WHAT people want you to be or act then you aren’t being YOURSELF being a puppet is NO way to live and until people get it through their heads the only person they need to listen to is themselves then the world will stay as it is. Theres no changes being made in the world anymore its just the same ol thing no one belives in peace or love or anything because *gasp* it might take effort! in a world where literally its at our finger tips no one is motavated to get OUT THERE and do something to make themselves proud! everyone just for 24 hours should just sit outside and FEEL the air on your skin, feel the sun shining down and have that ONE moment of PURE happiness no matter how short it may last! If I were only to live to experiance one laugh one smile one moment of thinking this is why i was born i would STILL be grateful because I had the chance to experiance that! just to be able to scream to the world I KNOW WHO I AM would be the ultimate moment because very few people KNOW who they are or where they come from no one wants to explore their feelings anymore! i want to tell people to LIVE!!!
March 27th 2001