I am so worn out this week. I have had two migraines so far and it’s only Tuesday. Damn high pressure weather.

I am getting utterly creeped out to come home and see on the caller id that my son’s father has been calling in the middle of the day and not leaving any sort of message. I don’t know if he expects my child to answer the phone (he won’t, he thinks everyone that calls is my sister, me, or a telemarketer) or what. Plus he has another wee myspace that people keep contacting me about. So ugh on that situation.

I have a few web related projects in the works for a few friends of mine, I will focus on that at home this week. I also need to suck it up and clean my damn bedroom. Toys and junk all over the place, driving me insane. I also need to do laundry but I keep losing the laundry cards heh. Not good.

I am still in this awful depression for the most part. I can’t seem to relax any. I think being so lonely has a lot to do with it. I have a car and don’t go anywhere. I still have no friends to hang out with. Who wants to be my friend? Woe.

I’ve been reading some of my old entries… jesus. It’s hard to believe that I actually used to be emotionally/mentally ok… for the most part anyway. I am somewhat frightened that “perky” and “frisky” were part of my daily… hell even hourly… vocabulary. Also, I was known as “Sprite” almost everywhere. It’s also so odd how you can have such a tight friendship one moment and have it be gone the next. I remember talking for hours with some people and then suddenly… wake up and realise you haven’t spoken in 6 months. Ok yeah not making any sense here.

Ugh I can not stand it when the guys reschedule appointments, don’t tell me (or anyone else) and then I have to deal with very irate customers (somewhat understandably so) wondering where the hell the guy is. Then, of course, they take it out on me. Oh wait, not only did this person go off, but now they cancelled their appointment. Just fantastic. Ugh.

Well, since I can’t think of anything else, go and visit Visionary Muse.

ETA

What the hell? Someone is trying to access my livejournal, I just got a few “lost password” emails, which turned out to be valid… so again… what the hell?

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malory
posted on March 28th 2006 at 9:20PM CST

hey, IM me when you get a chance

sn onthewaitingline

naomi
posted on March 29th 2006 at 7:25AM CST

ahh, migranes look slike they hurt:( sorry to hear that.
I’m sorry to hear about your son’s dad. I think you may be able to find friends, maybe your co-workers? Because at a young age, you really don’ have a life and you are a loner. But when you get to 20 or something that’s when you begin to have your own life:)
I know what you mean about waking up and realising you hav’ts spoken to them in 6 months, and it’s sad:(
I hope you get your LJ fixed, someone is hacking things everywhere. i jsut got my Q&A script hacked. a well. take care

Nat Marie
posted on March 30th 2006 at 6:32AM CST

I have a journal at another site and I looked through my entries just recently (all 100+ of them) and realized that I was so much happier back then too.  I had friends who I saw every day, and a boyfriend who cared…

Anyway, it will get better.  There is hope.  It doesn’t seem like it now, but there is.

Also, if I had money for a plane ticket, I’d hang with ya. :)

Alyssa
posted on March 30th 2006 at 8:03PM CST

Hey, hun. Sorry you’ve been feeling stressed and having maigraines lately. I’ve been experiencing alot of major headaches. They hurt like a bitch. I jsut hope you’re feeling better and things get sorted out! =)

Stacy
posted on March 31st 2006 at 3:18AM CST

Ooh sorry you’re feeling that way, maybe you need to do something spontaneous to spice things up and get you out of the funk.

Why does someone want to get in your livejournal anyway? They should go make their own lj.

Maevyn
posted on March 31st 2006 at 1:00PM CST

(((Hugs))) I’ve been where you are, at least as far as the depression goes. I know that it looks like a long way back up, but believe me, you can do it. It takes time, and it takes energy, and it’s not easy sometimes, but it CAN be done. I’ve recently recovered from a nasty bout of it myself, but I’m finding that every day gets a little easier. There are people that love & care about you, so just try to remember that, and hey, I’ll be your friend, and I’d hang out with you if we lived closer. :)

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