I am VERY upset. I just got off of the phone with Ali. Some of you that I have talked to know, I do NOT want ANYONE here to visit while I am in the hospital, which will be from Wednesday to if LUCKY out by Friday. Anyways I made this VERY clear to both her and my mother. My mother seems fine with that, she told me to just let her know seven days in advance to whenever I want her to come. Anyways, so last night after many phone calls to track ali down, to leaving her emails, she calls me, I tell her about what is going on with the baby, and she goes “Oh I will visit from Wednesday until Saturday then” I told her, No, do not come up while I am in the hospital. I will need any help from her once I am OUT of the hospital, although not sure what help she could provide since obviously she is no where near having kids. Anyways, she told me to call her after seven pm her time at work. So I called. She tells me “I got until Saturday” I start getting irritated and upset once I heard that. I start telling her that is pointless, to not do that but to stay and work and perhaps try to get the next week off instead. She says “No that is when I am coming up” So I tell her she can not FORCE her way here to see the baby or me, she tells me “yes I can,I am coming up” so I asked her where she will stay “Oh I will find a way” then tries to get me off of the phone. I mean, come on, am I in the wrong about feeling this way?? I have ENOUGH issues to deal with right now including a nice hefty fear of a major operation n all! What to do?? Everytime I seem to FINALLY get semi perky I somehow make the mistake of talking to family members who LOVE to know all the details of my pregnancy, and somehow blab PERSONAL details to EVERYONE, I’m upset that people I don’t even KNOW, have details that I only told my family about. I mean if I wanted EVERYONE to know EVERYTHING, I blog about it. I just, do not know what to do. I just want to cry, but crying just makes me throw up, literally. I just do not know what to do.
January 3rd 2002